


Hold Me Hard and Mellow

by newmrsdewinter



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Light Angst, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:02:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22776094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newmrsdewinter/pseuds/newmrsdewinter
Summary: Felix sees traces of her presence everywhere without even trying.
Relationships: Annette Fantine Dominic/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 12
Kudos: 48
Collections: Those Who Drabble in the Dark





	Hold Me Hard and Mellow

**Author's Note:**

> another drabble prompt! this week, it's "lost chances"

Weeks pass, one by one, and Felix wonders if it’s a good idea to text Annette on her birthday. 

He awakes next to her empty space on the bed of the apartment they used to share. His hands reach out instinctively to press his forehead against Annette’s and whisper good morning, but he freezes once he remembers she’s not there anymore. He plops himself face-first onto his pillow, fighting back the urge to throw the covers over his head and fall back asleep. 

For a long time, that’s the only thing he does, lie down with his mind filled to capacity with memories of the past and nagging thoughts about the future. He yearns for the days he took for granted, the nights where Annette would wrap her arms around him, resting her head upon his chest until his breathing calms and their heartbeats synchronize as one. 

Eventually, hours later, Felix sighs as he rubs his face, prickly because he hasn’t shaved in three days. The rest of his energy is spent groping for his phone in relative darkness. He doesn't have the heart to purge Annette’s number from his contacts. After unlocking the screen, his hand hovers over their anniversary picture, but he immediately dims the brightness after tapping on it, blinded not so much by the light of his phone than the endearing way her smile used to crinkle her eyes. 

_Happy birthday,_ he types and promptly backspaces. _Remember that cake you taught me how to bake last year? I still have the recipe you left. It’s good. Even the boar says he liked it._

A prick of pain causes him to glance down and realize that he’s gripping his phone so tightly that the spiderweb cracks in the screen dig into his fingertips. Dimitri’s old moniker stares at him from the text box like an omen. A reminder. Felix deletes everything, ashamed of himself. He’s falling back into old habits — bad habits. No more bitterness, Annette had pleaded. No more resentment. Not once did she ask Felix to be anyone less than who he was, but time had whittled down her patience into matchsticks that eventually burned to cinders.

_Dimitri’s doing well, Annette. Better than he has in ages. I never thought I’d live to say it, but I’m proud of him. I wish you were here to see it._

The pang in his chest worsens the longer he stares at the messages he’s too scared to send. By the time the sun has dipped below the horizon, he has mentally crafted a novel of all the feelings he can no longer hold back, laments for opportunities lost, and the closure he hopes to obtain. So much time has passed, and he can’t remember the last time he saw her. None of it should matter anymore, but it does. 

_I heard our favorite song the other day, and I thought of that time we got kicked out of karaoke ‘cause we were so loud and drunk. A small part of me wonders if you remember what it was like before it all fell apart. I think about it every day._

_Sometimes, I feel as though all the color has been sucked out of my life, and it makes me sorry that this couldn’t be the relationship you hoped it would be._

_Don’t you wish we could turn back time and start all over again? I don’t know. I still don’t know. I just miss you, Annette. Full stop. It’s not about the reasons or regret anymore. I miss you so much it hurts._

Felix wants to say that his hand slips, but it doesn’t. Throwing all caution to the wind, without any lines planned or rehearsed, he presses the call button, closes his eyes, and waits. 

"We’re sorry. You have reached a number that has been disconnected or no longer in service…"

His hand goes slack. The phone clatters to the floor. He stares blankly at the screen now shattered beyond repair, his mind struggling to catch up with what has happened. 

“Well,” he breathes, careening under a wave of disappointment. “I didn’t see that coming.” 


End file.
